Sunday, April 6, 2008

I'm one of "those" people...

I have a confession to make...and I hate it...it's just killing my pride.  One pet peeve I have is when people don't write thank you cards.  I don't mean for every menial occasion, but for weddings, baby showers, birthdays, or when someone goes out of their way to do something special for you, I think a personal note is common courtesy.  Some people send mass produced cards that say, "thank you for coming to my wedding and thank you for the gift."  HORRIBLE!!!  If you can't take the time to write a simple thank you naming the gift the person so carefully thought to purchase for you (or were kind enough to get off your registry so it was something you actually wanted), then you don't deserve their kindness.  I realize it is the 21st century, and I am not so old school that I think you actually have to put ink to paper.  For most occasions, an email acknowledging their kindness will suffice.  But to do NOTHING, is selfish.

Now that I have been on my soapbox and made my position clear......I have become one of *those* people!!!  I really hate to admit this.  I had a list of thank you's to write after Adeline's 1st birthday (yes, I know that was the end of Feb!!!).  The list has been lost in the same vacuum where baby girl socks and pens disappear.  I was trying to get most of them done before we left for vacation.  The list had at least 10 names, and I think I only completed 4.  I can remember at least two more I need to write, but I KNOW there are more of you out there.  If you are one of the wonderful gift givers that I missed, PLEASE know that I am thankful for your thoughtfulness and generosity (not only am I one of "those" people, but I just offered one of those catch-all thank you's that is impersonal and reeks of selfishness...Ugh!).

The other day, one of my best friends Skyped me (you know who you are).  In the course of our conversation, she said, "I just want to make sure you got the package I sent."  OH...um....(I know I composed the thank you in my head...did I REALLY not send a card?).... double Ugh!!!  Of course I remember getting the package.  I thanked her profusely and admitted to my complete embarrassment.  She has known me for a VERY long time and is like a sister to me, so she has seen me make MUCH bigger mistakes and treat her with varying degrees of kindness, yet loves me in spite of myself.  She made me look her in the eyes and told me NOT to send a thank you card.

I composed it today and it will be in the mail tomorrow.....

9 comments:

Mari said...

I am one of those people too! I hate it when people don't take the time to send thank you's but I know I have forgotten a time or two. What I am really bad at is sending cards - I plan too but never get around to it!

Jenni S. said...

Oh Lynn - I know what you mean. I want so desperately to make sure I send all the appropriate thank yous so people know how much we appreciate them and then it becomes April and the the thank yous from my birthday (also in Feb) have gone unsent.

Thankfully, friendship is about grace - some of us (meaning me) just require a little more than others. You seem to have such a gentle, generous heart, I'm sure your friends will understand.

Janelle said...

OUCH. That was a direct hit. I have become increasing bad about this over the last couple of years. But I do take comfort in knowing that my good friends forgive me. Most of them do the same!

Thanks for being honest and confessing that it has happened to you, too!

Anonymous said...

If I've forgotten I should be ashamed. I feel this is one thing in our busy day and age that we should not forget.

When my daughter got married we bought the thank you cards ahead and addressed them according to her guest list. I told her write a note and be very personal. People spend hard earned money on gifts and a simple and sweet thank you is appropriate.

Now...who have I forgotten recently...ahhhh! You've made me think!

Nancy said...

I used to be so good about sending thank yous. I wrote them for just about everything. (Like if someone gave me a tissue, practically.) But then I had three kids. In three and a half years. And I struggle to find time to do things like go to the bathroom. Thank you notes have gone by the wayside, unfortunately. I'm sure I'll pick up the habit again eventually.

Kristen said...

I am the same way about thank you notes! I get nervous when they aren't out about a week later thinking people will be upset. I know I have mistakenly forgotten some over time - it happens.

Your post made me laugh!! You have had quite a busy month - your parents visiting, Easter, taking a vacation. I am sure all who know you well know it was an oversight!

I like your signature - a new trick you learned?

Short Stop said...

I can relate to just about every word here. I always have good intentions about thank you notes. But, then I run out of stamps, or I forget to mail them, or the stack gets lost under piles of junk mail and then I feel terrible.

But, I agree with Jenni...true friendship is about grace and anyone who knows you, knows your heart!

Mary@notbefore7 said...

Oh Lynn, I am SO THERE with you. I am a card person. But give yourself some grace. It is tough to keep all of the balls completely juggled.

I have had to email people weeks after sending something to make sure they got it. It's understandable.

Now you will remember that on the flip side and you can extend that same grace to someone else who is behind in their cards.

It is hard, but yes, it needs to be done.

Tropical Mexican said...

I am now of those people that is not so good. I hate it, it isn't because I am not thankful, and I am sure there are many people who think I am ungrateful or selfish.

Part of my problem, and I am not making excuses for myself, is that my handwriting is terrible and my spelling is even worse. I am not joking here, I have many Christmas cards returned every year because of my penmanship. Even my parents was returned this year. So I have a bit of anxiety when it comes to handwriting things. I'm working on it.